And again...

NewScientist, 21st July 2007

(Article, "Global Shades" opening sentence.)

"Even with the best will in the world, reducing our carbon emissions is not going to prevent global warming."

Exactly right - this article brings to mind Nigel Lawson's lecture to the Centre for Policy Studies in late 2006 about which I blogged here.

Lawson summarises his lecture thus:

"Essentially, I have sought to argue three key propositions.

First, the relatively new and highly complex science of climatology is an uncertain one, and neither scientists nor politicians serve either the truth or the people by pretending to know more than they do.

Second, far and away the most rational response to such climate change as, for any reason, may occur, is to adapt to it.

And third, the rich countries of the temperate world have an obligation to assist the poor countries of the tropical world to undertake whatever adaptation may be needed."

There exists limited time, energy and money. Why are we continuing to waste (huge amounts of) these in trying to stop something that can't be, when we could be using them helping those likely to be most affected?

24-7 Ibiza Summer 2006

See what these guys do - you get a much clearer impression with a video. Brian spoke at Church, you can listen here - he's the one sunning himself.

Meritocracy? Not good enough.

If you have the ability, you should get your chance - Does this sum up the meritocratic aim? Probably. Been thinking about the Paul Potts video clip posted below and what's been troubling me is this: The guy shambles onto the stage and we all dismiss him. I mean, look at him! Stop wasting our time. He has no merit. So far. Then, he sings and now the "truth" is revealed - he can sing, really sing, he has merit, he has worth, now we love him, we really love him!! Why? Because he has given something to us. He has moved us. He is now useful to us. It's less about him, than us.

The same man walked onto the stage as walked off. Now we love him. What if he'd opened his mouth and confirmed our assumptions? Now we don't love him. Now we pity him and send him away.

You see my point? Meritocracy, forgive me, is dependent on perceived merit. Meritocracy can be brutal. What about those without perceived merit?

Jesus went to those without "merit" didn't he? Not for him a meritocracy. God's Kingdom is not like this because God is not impressed with "merit" but sees through to the heart.

God's Kingdom is about grace.

What grace would Paul Potts have been shown if he hadn't been able to sing?

Ale nomenclature

I was at the Men's (gggrrrrrrrrr...) get together at The Gate last night and had a fine time. Now that the pubs are smoke free and hence largely empty I thought I'd go along. I was kindly bought a couple of bottles of alcohol free Holsten which definitely tasted more like beer than Coke. Pretty much. Anyway, there were three of us left at the end (hardy souls) and I'm proud to say I invented a new ale. I mean, the name for a new ale. We were discussing our favourites - mine being London Pride, Flowers, HSBC erm, no hang on that's a bank, and (shh, don't tell real ale aficionados...) Directors. By the way, Courage Best at our Student bar when I first pitched up was 65p a pint!! (The Bar did go bust at some point...). But I digress. As I offered my choices I was struck at how simple the names were compared to "really proper" ales. So, imagine the quirksome pleasure of walking confidently to the bar and saying, "Hello there, a pint of Old Grumbleweedwhiskersbottom please." Does this or does this not sound just like a real ale? Yes it does. One day, who knows, you may get your chance. Any backers?

WHAT A MOMENT THIS IS!!

This has brought tears to my eyes...

Train of thought?

Yesterday, walking towards the school to drop the kids off the conversation went like this:

Kidofmine: Why do we walk down this side of the road?
Me: Because we use the Lollypop lady at the end of the road and she's on this side.
Kidofmine: But after school we walk back along the other side of the road...
Me: We utilise the Lollypop lady but down the road a little to cross to the other side of this road since we turn left at the top of the road because that's where I normally park the car.
Kidofmine: Why do cats lick their bottoms?

Over designed or what?

Saw this whiteboard eraser thingy this morning at preschool and had to take a photo. Someone designed this, and they really need to get out more.

Take a look:
1. Aerodynamically optimised.
We've all suffered the embarrassment of air resistance at the whiteboard surface slowing us down.
2. Lifted nose for even smoother operation.
No more getting stuck upon impact with a particularly thick line.
3. Extra grippy grey stuff ensuring no slipping mid stroke.
Forget seeing the eraser flying from your hand through the window.

Where would we be without great design like this?

Hmmm, interesting...

I went to Countess Mountbatten Hospice today in response to a request in our weekly newsletter for drivers. They need a few more people to transport patients, relatives and small bits of equipment. As our four (incredible) kids have got older my role as a Homedad has changed and I have more time freed up for other things - in October our youngest will be all day at school so loads more golf. Erm, I mean work...

Anyways, towards the end of the meeting I was asked if I'd had a close bereavement recently and, as you may know, my Dad died last October. Now, they don't allow anyone to help in this way until 2 years after a close loss. So I can't do it. This is a good rule but I hadn't thought about that so it was a bit of a, "Ah, right..." moment.

It's made me think hard today (even harder than normal...) because when I saw the request for volunteers it felt right and I could see how I could be a help in the community.
But I can't do it.

I think God said, "No, not now Mark." He's made his point and I wouldn't have got it without being turned down. I think he's asking me to concentrate on the things he has given me to do. My stuff at church is increasing, we're in a new season, and I know this will take significant time and energy. And let me not forget I am a Husband and still a Homedad. I think he's also said, "Just do what I give you as well as you can. Focus your energies on these things."

In the "Battleship surrounded by fishing vessels" picture I knew straight away that my primary place was on the battleship - this is where my energies will be concentrated. After this morning I feel as though I've been given "permission" to do just that: concentrate on the things he's given me and do them as well as I can with what he's given me, and stop feeling so guilty about not doing things he's not given me to do.

Minority sports,,,

Just been listening to Radio 4 on the way back from school pick up - they were talking about speedway. a reporter had been to a match to sample the experience. He was making the point that, as with other minority sports, the fans are utterly devoted. Perhaps the smaller fan base makes you feel a bit more special? Maybe. There was also a piece about the Tour de France which will be starting in London. Hang on a minute... London? Tour de.....?? Anyway, the guy was expounding the benefits of cycling and how it was becoming more and more popular in this country...

We are wired to be devoted to something and to promote that something. Hence, a fan of a particular minority sport, given the airtime, will become quite evangelical about his or her particular sport - we should all be doing it. But to what end, I ask myself? I was reminded of this, Psalm33:

17 A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save.

Sport is also a vain hope for deliverance, despite all its great wonders it cannot save. To hear some going on about their particular sport, you'd think it can.

Oh, and when is the Olympics coming to London? I'm not sure y'see, I can't read the Flintstone/Street logo...

My joke of the day :-)

My friend Duncan was telling me about the gun culture in the States - you can go to a supermarket and buy breakfast cereal, milk, coffee, a gun, ammo...

So my joke of the day was: "So when you get to the checkout, do they ask if you'd like help with your packing?"

I thank you, I thank you...

Here you go, Mum...

My Mum's having trouble with her email connection so I'm posting pictures of the "boys" here :-)

Top is Boots (black nose) and the bottom one is Socks (pink nose).

Puuuurrrrrrrrrrr...

We have, as of last Thursday morning, two kittens!

They are sooooooooooooooo cute :-)

They're called Socks and Boots.
The kids wanted Socks and Pants but I had to say no to that...

It's almost ENTIRELY the Sun.

How many of us have actually looked at length at the evidence for "Anthropogenic Global Warming"? Anyone? Not many, and that's fair enough because it is very very complicated stuff. We rely on those we believe know more than us to inform us about the science, right?

Read this article with an open mind.

Do you know better than these people?

As I've intimated before, we are being led up the CO2 garden path.

Quite amoosing...

The other day my beautiful wife enjoyed a yoghurt made with "organic" milk. Presumably from an organic cow. So what's an organic cow, then? I've had a look at the manufacturer's website and an organic cow is a relaxed cow. A chilled out cow. It has lots of room to roam. Its life would seem to be stress free. If an organic cow gets ill it's treated with homeopathic and herbal remedies and offered counselling (OK, I made up the last bit...). These are happy cows - not the grumpy, miserable, fed up, grouchy cows that supply our regular milk...

Is the milk is delivered in organic lorries driven by organic drivers? Hmmm, is the driver's ciggy made with organic tobacco? Hang on, just going to Google to see if you can get organic tobacco...

...of course you can!! What was I thinking? You can get tobacco grown without the use of harmful chemicals. FANTASTIC! (Surely this defines irony?)

"Organic fags - better for you and the environment"

Grace...

When I about 21 I knew everything. Dunno what's happened in the meantime! Actually, I do know. I've been shown grace. "Shape up or ship out" is great until it's you who doesn't "shape up", right? I want another chance when I make a mistake, not to be written off. As I'm shown grace, I find that I'm naturally more gracious to those around me.

An occasion that blew me away was when I was to lead the worship at a men's conference years ago, Friday night and then Saturday. I was late for the Friday and missed the slot completely - someone else stepped in for me at the last minute. The thing was, though, when we arrived and walked in I shot a look at the Pastor who just waved, smiled and shrugged. I felt such grace toward me. His simple act still informs my actions to this day.

I heard Steve Chalke on the radio - a lady was trying to badger him into giving a yes or know answer to a complex question. Then he said this:

"The problem with black and white answers, with premature black and white answers, is that they crush people."

How right he is. We're not to crush people but love them. More and more I see that one rule does not fit all, that each person presents a unique set of circumstances, and as I've said before, we are not in possession of all the facts. No wonder he said not to judge...

Dual monitors!!

So Tommy and I were sitting in my "Office" ("Dump" to some...) and he suggested I have two monitors instead of one. I thought, "Wow, it'll look like CSI!!". So I started looking into it, and, I have, incredibly, managed it!

I bought a dual monitor 64Mb ATI Radeon 7000 PCI card from Ebay for £20. PCI, y'see, because ours is quite an "old" PC and that's all its got. The nice checkout guy at PC World said to me, "Are you sure you've got PCI Express?", to which I replied, "Erm, ah, uh, dunno, good point, praps I'll go and check..." and we don't. Not even AGP. It's a wonder I manage to even read my emails with such lamentable graphics capabilities.

Anyway, the double bonus is not only the ability to, "Increase my productivity" as Tommy said (I can hear my wife sniggering already...) but also to improve the quality of the vids I record for Youtube (acoustic guitar tuition) - which this new card has done as well.

So, job done, and I feel all clever. Clever me :-)

Dentist

I had to go to the dentist this morning and I was pretty nervous. Last time I went it was e needle job and you KNOW how I feel about needles! I did feel more peaceful going this time though. I was worried as a chunk had broken off one of my teeth and I was imagining what might be necessary - multiple injections, drills, hammers, chisels...

...as it turned God let me off AGAIN - NO NEEDLE!! PHEWEEEEE!!

He's very good this dentist (my wife, Ali, posted about him on her blog), puts you at your ease, nothing's a big deal (said I had really nice teeth!) - the last dentist made everything sound like a big deal, very scary...

My "really nice" teeth are all clean again, yay!!

I ask you??

Just returned from a Preschool Funday. Last year there was a balloon race - the kids put their names on and the balloons sail of into the sky, you know the sort of thing...

This year there wasn't one. Someone on the committee had said that the balloons weren't environmentally friendly.


AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good morning?

My alarm radio came on at a quarter to seven this morning. I'm used to this but today my day began with hearing a report about East Congo; I'm not sure there has been a report that has left me more affected. Such cruelty, such hate, such evil - I am still in a bit of a daze after what I heard. I'm not about to rehearse it here but you'll probably find it here.

I'm forcefully reminded again that this world is in a desperate state. It's not good enough simply to not think about it. We are called to think about it, pray about it, cry out to God, "HOW LONG LORD?"

As I've grown a bit older I'm noticing a subtle but important shift in myself. I have it very good. God has been very, very good to me and if he never gave me another thing I would still be embarrassed with all his blessing to me. Not long ago, I would have said that, yes, I wanted Jesus to come back, but not quite yet - I'm having too good a time!

Now, as my awareness of the world around me increases and I dwell on its true state - I say, NOW!

Debate: Does organic produce taste better?

That's that settled then :-)

Klestrol

Had some blood taken the other day for my cholesterol test. I have to say I'm not expecting great news when the numbers come back - I was almost surprised the nurse got it to go up the needle!! I don't know if the nurse spotted signs of stress but she asked me, "Are you OK with needles?" - I replied, "It depends how quick you are...", which reminds me...

...I don't like needles. At all. When Ali was a hospital doc she ever so kindly volunteered me to be a practise pin cushion for med students. Thanks baby. It's OK, I thought, face your fears, get it out the way...

So I pitch up and as they start jabbing me I realise that they've NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE!! Thanks for the heads up darling... I take a hit to the right arm, then a hit to the left, right again and then this young boy of about 8 takes aim and he's coming at me waving the needle about like it could go ANYWHERE... my mouth goes dry, my palms are sweaty and I...pass out. Ali woke me with a kiss, (too little too late if you ask me) the 8 year looks really guilty and then I have to get a friend to pick me up as now I'm not allowed to drive. Right.

So, my advice to anyone out there with an irrational fear is simply to face it and wonder why you bothered.

I still fear needles. Wierd, huh?

Imagine what it would be like...

...if there were no sin.

We are so used to sin that we don't notice its effect around us.

Let me get you started and then you have a go:

My bunch of keys I carry around - would I need them?
The bank I went to today - what would that look like? (Would there even be a bank?)
The bus shelter?
Our church building with it's electric shutters and alarm system?
PIN numbers?
Internet security?
Car radio codes?
Police?
Litter?
The list must be endless...


You see where I've gone with this...what do you think?

Spiderman 3

I went to see spiderman 3 on Monday with our two boys and a couple of friends. Nowadays when I watch a film like this I try to look at what it's saying about us as people. God created all of us in his image and aspects of this come out all over the place in our lives. This can be in our creativity, our love, our yearning for justice, our built in perception of good and evil etc...

Here are three bullet points from the film:
> The "evil" that comes is from outer space in the form of an unexplained black stuff. Within the story there was a need for an outside agency to provide this - as if there's not enough around as it is (see above post...)?
> Society's need for someone to save us - sound familiar? Who will save us? Spidey can only save us from crime - Jesus can save us in all areas of our lives.
> Spidey forgives but only in the light of new knowledge providing extenuating circumstances. This is not really forgiveness is it? Forgiveness is saying, "I give this over to God in all its blackness." We are never in possession of all the facts about someone and so are never in a position to truly judge. Only God is in possession of all the facts.

Finally, I loved the fact that we could tell whether he was Evil Peter or Good Peter just from his fringe!!

Nice one :-)

This makes me laugh and laugh!

Rhotacism

Rhotacism is a defective utterance of the "r" sound. Ironic that the word itself begins with that exact sound, eh?

Anyway, I've been aware for a long time that my "r" can sound a little like a "w". I've noticed it most on my song recordings - it's not major but I can hear it...

So, a couple of days ago I thought I'd have a Google and see what I could find...and...I found a cure!!

I'm 38 and I've only just learned how to pronounce the letter "r"!!

You don't really use the lips, this is what leads to a "w"ish sound. I found this: you make an "l" sound with your tongue touching the top of your mouth and then you just slide the tongue back wards while sounding and it become an "r" sound! I was amazed! A revelation!

I also found a drill to train your tongue to perform this new trick. You find a word with "tr" in it and replace the "r" with a "d". Stay with me here. So let's use "strumming" - you say "stdumming" over and over and the transition becomes natural after a time and it becomes the correct "r" sound.

For me, singing is all about confidence, and I have reached a level of confidence with which I'm happy - but - the "r" thing was in the back of my mind nonetheless. So, now I have a solution to the pronunciation problem I am OVER THE MOON :-)

2007 Curry Cup

My brother and someone he knows called Mike have been, for about 9 years, annually competing golfwise for the "Curry Cup" - a sad, laughable trophy made out of a tin on a bit of wood. About 5 years ago I joined them so that someone else could come last each year. So it was that the three of us gathered last Friday for 36 holes at East Horton with 18 to follow on the Saturday at Old Thorns.

All of us were extremely well prepared. I'd played twice or so this year and been to the range with our two sons the previous day, Pete hadn't played this year and Mike thought we were there to play snooker.

Anyways, we all had a lovely time. Which is unusual. Normally Pete seriously strops in a bunker, gives it a good hammering and sulks for an hour and Mike takes a vow of silence whenever it rains which can be the entire day. This year all was well - glorious sunshine and less chaffing than usual due to the competition being shortened to three rounds and the profligate use of ointments. A few years ago we played five rounds, I think, and by the Sunday I could barely even walk I was so sore.

Mike wasn't quite up to his usual standard - apart from his jamminess; whenever his ball hit a tree it would "conveniently" ricochet back to safety. He also seemed to struggle to summon the strength to putt the ball all the way to the hole. Nearly every time.

I was very happy with my game, hit my BLADES (that's BLADES right?) well and didn't suffer with the nerves of past years. And yes, I did come last. Someone has to.

Old Thorns, by the way, is a lovely course - just what I like, if not a little challenging hikewise - I tell you what, if you can make it to the third tee with enough breath left to swing the club you've done well.

Pete won, proving that the less you play the better you get - if he never plays again he'd be brilliant.

Shrink Wrap - Stephen Fry

Tonight was Stephen Fry and it was another fascinating programme. Pamela Connolly was more explicit in her aim to peek around the edge of the celebrity facade and discover the person behind. She was much more bullish than she was last night with Sharon Osbourne, pressing Stephen more and, it seemed to me, with more of a specific destination in mind.

The thing that jumped out at me most was his abiding impression of himself as a FRAUD. This is a very common condition - yet again Radio 4 has been the source of education. Most of us, it seems, are wondering just how long will it be before I'm found out?? We carry the nagging thought that we're just bluffing our way along. Very successful people on the Radio 4 programme were describing just this. To the onlooker, it is lunacy! These people are so clearly good at what they do, how could they possibly not be super confident and self assured??

However, even though the visible celebrity develops in response to increasing "success" the inner person remains with all the same hopes, hurts, insecurities and fears. Possibly the more lauded you are, the greater the fear of being uncovered.

In our Sunday morning get together at our house I was describing my "glass sphere". I am in this sphere and according to the situation in which I find myself I will paste to the inside facets of myself - real or affected - to present as good an impression as possible to the outside. Rather, this is the temptation, isn't it? Socially, of course, this is at times wholly appropriate; each of us will adjust our behaviours in line with the expectations of those around us. But, it is for us to decide when and where this is a good thing or a bad thing, and to what extent we reveal or conceal ourselves.

Celebrity takes this to the extreme, it seems to me, and glancing through "Hello" (not mine, I assure you...) it looks terrifying.

More4 Shrink Wrap

Just watched the first of 5 Shrink Wrap programmes on More4 - Dr Pamela Connolly (ne Stephenson married to Billy) is now a clinical psychologist and has been for about 15 years. In these programmes she's examining the psychological trauma of fame. Tonight's interviewee was Sharon Osbourne. What a fascinating thing to see - I heard about it on Radio 4 last week and put a reminder in my phone to watch it.

Celebrity does not look healthy to me and, at the very least without protection , looks precarious in terms of mental health. We can see, if we're that desperate, in Hello or whatever, piccies of Sharon with comment about how she's looking and how we think she's doing but, hear her story and it's a different story altogether.

What struck me was the demonstration that we're all the same. Same needs, insecurities, wants, hurts etc...etc...

Before God, we know that we are all the same. On the one hand, tiny, short lived, just one of billions, not that important. On the other though, loved perfectly by our Father who knew us even before we were born and for whom Christ was crucified.

Sharon said that she'd felt alone in her life. Alone although surrounded by many. This is not God's plan for us - Jesus will never leave me even if everybody else does. So many people are struggling through feeling alone when Jesus himself would be there by their side.

It is for us to be the message and reveal Jesus for the Good News we know him to be.

How? Well, after 2000 years we are still finding out.

Do you thank?

You know when you're driving along and you let the car at the other end of the road go first (because there's one lane free due to parked cars...)? This is a daily event for me on the school run(s) and I've been considering my reaction when people don't raise a hand to say thanks. My knee jerk reaction is to get annoyed. Then I think about it and it doesn't make much sense, does it? I form an opinion about someone based on whether they can be bothered to wave at me? Why do I do that?

A while ago I did hear this discussed on the radio - the guy was saying that in letting someone else go first we imagine we have unilaterally entered into a form of social contract with the other party. I'll let you go first and you will thank me. But you don't thank me and therefore you have broken the contract. So that's what sort of person you are, eh? Someone who would break a contract, go back on your word, hypocrite!!

Consequently I ALWAYS say thanks very obviously (hand high in the windscreen, fingers spread and mouthing, "Thank you, thank you!") when I'm let through to leave the other person in no doubt as to the quality of my fine character.

Webtastic 2

Well Youtube continues to amaze me - it's part of the reason I've not blogged recently, my attention has been on the "new" thing. 2 weeks since my vid postings and I'm nearly on 2000 viewings! Makes the old blog traffic look a bit paltry but don't worry, I value both of you very very much :-)

Webtastic!

Yesterday I posted on Youtube some guitar chord instruction videos recorded via my webcam. I wanted to show people it's so much more straightforward than it looks. I've posted my tips and tricks for easier playing, you see I don't do anything technically difficult - I just try and do simple things as well as I can.

Anyway, since yesterday I've had 140 video views! Amazing! I have two people subscribing to my "Channel" both in the States.

I find the whole thing mind boggling - in a few minutes I can record and make available a video that could be viewed all over the world :-0

Chair manufacture...

At the meeting posted about below we sang, "You are the hungry" for the first time together. It really is one of the great joys in my life to successfully communicate something of God with song. I only write songs for the body to sing. This song hit it's mark - the people "got it" and I could see it happening! It's not so much about me and my songs but about being used by God to further his purposes. Of course it's rewarding if someone likes your song, but so much more important is the successful communication of something from God. That's what does it for me, that is so much more rewarding.

So, if this communication is the crux of the matter then I am presented with a problem as I have quite a few songs now just sitting here. Each one on the blog (and lots don't make it...) is there because I feel they contain something worth passing on. I believe these songs can be a blessing to people. If I were a chair maker I would want people to sit on my chairs. That's what chairs are for. Songs are written to be listened to, that's what they're for.

So I've been thinking about a way to use these chairs. What I'm after is a dynamic, immediate, responsive, easy and cheap way for songs from the body to be available to the body. Well, of course, it's the web isn't it? I can record a song at my home in a day, upload it and there it is available to whomever wants to listen to it! Amazing! So, the new song you sang at your meeting can be in your car or in your kitchen on the Monday! (Download and burn, if you don't know what that means ask someone...) The song may only have a lifespan of a month, in which case, no problem as we haven't invested a huge amount of time, money and energy into it. It served its purpose and we simply move on!

So, help yourselves to my songs and enjoy!

Cultural differences?

Sunday we had Marc Dupont speaking at our meeting, hear what he said here. He was giving church incredibly encouraging words and as he did he'd say, "try not to look so encouraged as you look right now..." - cos we're all sitting there in silence! Inside, I was going, "Yes, yes!! That is FANTASTIC!!" and on the outside I was, well, British? We loosened up a bit towards the end when I definitely heard someone say, "Yes."

School place trauma

It's that time of year when I'm reminded of last year's school place trauma. Kids 1 and 2 safely ensconced in their schools (Infant and Junior) but kid 3 doesn't get a place. I was beside myself as the reason for this was our acceptance form was late. We'd had two weeks to get it back to them but left it until two days before the deadline and then posted it. I don't know what we were thinking. It took ten days to go a few miles. I could see my A1 plan going out the window and we had no excuse! We went on the waiting list for out of area kids (we'd moved since the boys started at the school...) thinking there'd be little chance of success but asking God for another demonstration of his MERCY - and we got a place for her! PHEW!!

Kid 4 had a place in the adjoining pre-school (where you need to put your name down as soon as the line changes colour on the pregnancy test) but they realised we'd moved and they rightly had to take her place back. We went on their waiting list for unlikely cancellations and... we got her back in again!! The irony was that a place had become available as several families hadn't managed to get their forms back on time! Really, that is so irresponsible!! Ahem... as I said at the time, "Praise God for other people's lackadaisical attitude!"

No problems this year - continuing siblings you see. Kid 2 goes to Juniors and kid 4 goes to Infants and I took NO chances. I personally handed the forms in and saw them stamped in my presence.

One Mum was describing her sleepless nights and tears every now and then due to the pressure of having to decide which school to try for her daughter, as she'd not got a place at her first choice.

Imagine not having our Father to ask about everything!

That is a scary situation - I don't know how people do it.

Alright, that's un oeuf (Sorry MH...)

Supermarket this morning and I coped better than last time when I was nearly in tears by the time I reached the leeks.

We needed eggs. The egg aisle set me thinking. It seemed that at one end you have the cheapest full deliberate vindictive cruelty to chickens option and at the other end you have the most expensive chickens living a life of conspicuous total luxury option.

So these chickens that are particularly happy - what does that look like? I'm wondering if they each have an eggs-box360 to play games on? Oh yes! I just HAD to put that in! Andy Fay will high five me for that :-)

I was thinking as I went along, "OK, at which point will I crack?" (Hey, that's another great pun!! Hot tonight!) I am assessing the lifestyle of these hens in relation to the price of the eggs. At what point do I say, "OK, no further, they're only chickens, these ones here are taken to the movies every Wednesday and get dental** - the eggs are £137 a dozen..." So I made a cost benefit judgement and bought Barn eggs: "Fresh eggs (good, not stale...) laid by hens (that's preferable...) that are housed in cage free barns." I will sleep soundly tonight.

**This should, in my opinion, counts as cruelty in itself, lulling chickens into your barn on the promise of a dental plan is just plain wrong. It's beyond a yoke.

Babel

Saw a very short clip from the film "Babel" last night, it made a big impression on me. A guy approaches a woman and says, "Can I pray with you?" (it's subtitled...) and she replies in her own language, "Can you say that a bit slower?" - the guy gives up and walks away.

It's my birthday!

Happy birthday to me!
38 now (strictly speaking, not for a couple of hours...). I gave a lift to someone after rehearsal tonight and mentioned that it's over 15 years since I finished university. Actually it's 17 years now. I find it a wierd thing to be able to say that. It does, however, seem OKish. Four kids, extremely happily married for 11 years, I think I should be about this age. BUT, I remember being 29 and just wanting to be 30. I thought 29 was the fag end of my 20s; too old to really consider yourself "in your twenties". Roll on 30, I thought!

40 feels different and that is a surprise to me! I'm not 40 yet, of course, butI've always been so forward looking (ask Caroline Kennedy - she tested me!) that my dreams are what almost exclusively drive me. The world has always been my lobster. I'm approaching 40 and for the first time I find myself wondering: what will I accomplish (although four incredible kids is probably enough)? I'm likely over half way now, I feel grown up, fairly anyway, but most of the time I feel like I've only just begun! The older I get the less I know I know. Andy Fay agrees with me here (his prayer on Sunday morning at our home group left us all tearful with laughter btw...) - the longer I live, the more guarded I am with my opinions. I've been alive long enough to have changed my mind several times about things I knew for absolute certain in my twenties...

Perhaps I shall become a wisened old man who never speaks at all!

Rarely as simple as I'd like...

I bought some memory for our main PC, 1GB of Ram allegedly compatible with our machine and it arrived yesterday. I couldn't see how to slide the side off the machine (it's OK, it is actually supposed to slide off...). Googled to find a reviewer saying how difficult it was and they'd had to apply significant force to get it off. Hmm. OK, significant force it is! Still couldn't do it so I used a screwdriver to lever it off (a little gung ho, I know...). Then I noticed the catch that just needs to be slid to one side with the easiest of touches and open sesame! Felt a little foolish at that point. No harm done thankfully, apart from a juicy gouge where I slipped!!

I de-static myself by grabbing the radiator and the computer at the same time whilst standing on a wood floor (just following instructions, well, not the radiator, that was my own idea...). Push the memory into the vacant slot and...it doesn't work. Computer won't boot with the new memory in either slot, alone or with the current 512K. Bah!

Just relieved it works again with the original memory in it. Phew!

Rarely as simple as you'd like...

On Radio 4 today I heard a discussion about energy saving light bulbs versus normal ones. How about this for a great argument:

1) Normal bulbs get hot and have a heating effect in your home.
2) Energy saving bulbs don't get very hot and so their heating effect is much less.
3) Your thermostatically controlled heating system compensates for this lack of heating by turning the heating on earlier thereby wiping out the energy savings due to the bulbs.

It's beautiful!!

In the post...

I'm at Mum's today. My brother and I have been sorting out some of Dad's stuff and moving beds etc. I was just glancing up at the scanner that Dad ordered. I posted about it here. It arrived after he died so he never saw it. It's very good, he'd have liked it.

Finished, again!

I've finished the song again and you can listen to it here.

As I said previously, it's about the now and not yet of God's kingdom.

This is the way of things until Jesus returns.

The pleasures and dangers of cynicism...

(Cynicism as it's conversationally understood as opposed to its classical definition...)

I hear on the radio that the England cricket team have won something! Fantastic! Or is it? You see, I have to confess to a niggling disappointment with this news. I know I felt it. I've been thinking about this and wondering why; I've come to these two conclusions:

a) Negativity is easy. Very easy. It takes no effort, whereas thinking positively can be a challenge.
b) Maintaining hope is tiring. It can lead to disappointment. Expect the worse and it's safer.

Especially in the body I need to be deliberately choosing to think well of people and their intentions. This verse springs to mind:

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Come on Ingerlund...

Kinda frustrating...

So I read Billy's blog post (Singing the Lord's song in a strange land?) and wrote a song about the now and not yet of God's kingdom. I like it, worked at it yesterday, got it recorded today to my satisfaction (which took a few hours). It wouldn't export to a WAV as my D drive was almost full so I made some space by deleting all my old recordings AND EVERYTHING I'D JUST DONE. AAAAARGH!

I'm re-recording it.

Kinda frustrating.

Does anyone else do things like this?

"I shall have a nice cup of coffee!"

Enter kitchen.
Take out used coffee filter full of grounds and go towards bin.
Bin is too full.
Put coffee filter back in machine.
Tie and lift out bin bag and go out to the green bins...
...which are still on the pavement from Monday morning.
No shoes on.
Right.
Put bag down on step and find shoes. Eventually.
Get green bins (well one, the other one can wait...) and deposit bag.
Right.
Get new bin liner from under sink - oh, these are the unnaturally long bags that the machine must have missed 'cos they are literally as tall as me. (Now, you can use these in the bin but it leads to trouble. The leaning tower can be ignored (by a man) for much longer as you know that the bag can take it!)
Put those bags back and get the right size one.
Put bag in bin and get some sort of mucky "stuff" on your finger.
Wash hands in sink.
No tea towel to dry hands.
Right.
Go to airing cupboard for tea towel.
Dry hands.
Stuff the coffee.
Leave kitchen.

I don't want to get toooooo thin...

YEAH RIIIIIGHT!!!

Well, I lost 1lb which does get me to the half a stone sticker (she didn't have any with her...).

I wanted to lose more but it was double last week's effort.

I gave Rob (his real name) a lift home and went the slightly longer way home and thought while I drove.

I was thinking, "All that restraint and self denial for just another pound!". Then I realised that I'm still seeing this as a time limited program that will come to an end. Then I'll put it all back on. That's what happened last time and that's what happens to lots of people who manage to lose weight. We say, "Phew, I've made it, thank you God it's over now! Now I can relax, I'll be thinner for ever...right, what shall I eat first??"

Now, I've been to another group that helps you face and manage the actual reasons why you eat as you do. This is a layer below isn't it? Eating can merely be the symptom of the underlying issue(s). Hence, we may get to our target weight by treating the symptom, but the issues remain and hey ho off we go again. So it is that so many are stuck on a merry-go-round of dieting/slimming plans.

If I can accept that eating less is a new way of life then that would be much better, wouldn't it?

"There is no (pudding) spoon."

There is no end to this program.

Addendum: I've just noticed what a bleak road picture I've chosen! OK, analyse, analyse, erm, a long road of self denial? Maybe...

50p

Weighed in at the slimming group thing (SGT) on Monday and this week I only lost half a pound. Half a lousy pound! Not impressed...

The friend I go with, let's call him "Rob" (for this is indeed his name), beat me by losing 2lbs, I think, so now it's 2-1 to him, and he got his half a stone sticker. Bah!

This Monday VICTORY WILL BE MINE!! I've had a good week and shown remarkable restraint so I'm expecting at least 2 lbs AND MY STICKER.

A key to a door

A man sat thinking about how busy he could become and how hard he could end up trying to impress and please everyone with his efforts. To allow his thoughts to settle he picked up his favourite guitar and started picking a couple of chords and a line came:

When all is said and done, I want to hear you say, 'Well done!'

The man was reminded that his greatest desire was for God to say, "Well done!" when he finally stood before Him.

He finished the simple song and recorded it. When his wife came home he left her alone to hear it. He always plays his songs to her first. The man heard his wife laugh out loud, "What?!", said the man, "What's so funny??",

"Someone saying 'Well done!' ", she laughed, shaking her head...

The man left his wife to listen some more.

When he went back after a few minutes she was crying.
During that week an anniversary of the death of a friend had passed. The man's wife was remembering her friend's great hope that He would say, "Well done!" to her when she stood before Him, for she had known that soon she would die.
The man's wife misses her friend terribly. No matter what we say to each other, for a time the absolute of separation remains.

The man had not been thinking of this when he'd written the song and he was amazed again at the connectedness of God and His people.

So the simple song serves as a small key to a door that opens into a room where God can comfort the man's wife in her grieving.

Such is the wonder of song.

Here's the song, "When all is said and done"

Moved

Mark Markiewicz spoke at our church meeting a couple of weeks ago about Justice for Children International and Stop the Traffik.

Things he describes will break your heart.

He told me about Ten Shekel Shirt and Lamont Hiebert who co-founded JFCI. Mark told me that Lamont "thinks that it is time for a Worship movement that has Justice at the centre of it."

Billy Kennedy spoke at that meeting about us being called to be the message - just what "You are the hungry" is all about.

So I sat and strummed and "For these ones" came out:

For these ones will not be forgotten
For these ones will not be alone
For these ones will not be abandoned
For these ones they will find a home

For hope is here

In hands that reach
In hearts that grieve
In works of faith
In word and deed

For these ones you have not forgotten
And with us they won't be alone
For these ones you have not abandoned
And with us you will bring them home

Flying

Last night on the telly there was a programme about whether we should all stop flying around the world in all these jet planes.

It was outraaaaaaaageous!!

OK, first part about the eeeeeevil airplanes and the eeeeeeeeevil people who want to fly in them.
Next, shots of Venice "sinking" due to rising water levels.

HANG ON! Erm, excuse me, what exactly is the link here??

Venice is sinking because of the airplanes? Riiiiiiiiight!



What bugged me the most was the hidden implied certain link between the planes and the water levels.

So, you take two variables that seem to have a correlation (and, boy oh boy, you want them to...) and in your mind you draw a lovely straight line graph to prove it. This is a classic error we see so many times. It's rarely as simple as this!! Just because two variables are varying as though they were directly linked it doesn't mean they definitely are.

So far, so good!

Well, I've had two weeks at the slimming group thing and my losses have been:

First week: 2 and 1/2 lbs
Second week: 3 lbs

Excellent! It worked last time I did it (a few years ago) and so I'm not surprised but it's very nice to be enjoying success :-)

Just before stepping on to the scales down there I feel such trepidation - it's such a relief when I lose! Then I come home and have (probably) my biggest meal of the week, well, I've got seven days to shift that, haven't I?

The last sausage revealed

(Song details in the next one?)

So the last sausage (original post here) can now be revealed as my acoustic guitar seen here being modelled by Andy Fay. This is the second picture I took as the first one (without flash) was blurred as he was playing so fast. Can't he play!! Oh, sorry, that should read - Can't he play??

Anyway, she's called "Mertyl" and she's beautiful. The guitar. He's called Andy and...the guitar's beautiful.

No, seriously folks, Andy's a good friend of mine and he won't mind all this gentle ribbing and he played just fine once I'd shown him which side the strings and hole were on. And stopped him blowing into it.

:-)

"It's a beautiful day"

OK, I'll post about the song in the next one...

Very, very windy yesterday, lots of damage up and down the country (I confess I have been driving the car again...?) but today all is calm.

I took this picture this morning after school drop off - amazing!

I regularly need reminding to look up more frequently and see what's around me.

"I love it when a plan comes together"

Today was my annual "tax the car oh no where are the other documents Ali help can't find them please God YES at last oh no the MOT's expired and I still can't find the insurance letter I never opened well what's the point I know what's in it anyway right arrange instant MOT where's the nearest place......" day.

But, I PULLED IT OFF!! Oh yeah, oh yeah!! Go Marky, go Marky...

God helped.

I sat at my PC after school drop off and my heart sank. I'm trying to finish a song and that tends to be just when I'm interrupted the most, like today with the road tax. Not happy. I just want to get ooooooonnnn...

"God, please help me?", I said.

From then on, plain sailing. Googled a local place with 5 star recommendations, rang them and booked the car in for 12 o'clock. But the driver's side wing mirror's cracked (dangerous to park outside the Lee's house...). Hmmm. Googled and found that Halfords do stick on mirrors so I got one for our car (£6.25), recorded a vocal, picked up Becky at 11:30, went to Express MOT who sorted us out (stuck the Halfords mirror on gratis) in an hour (Becky was provided with an alphabet puzzle).

I knew I had no MOT when I tried to get a new tax disc online first thing this morning. We came straight back from Express MOT and already the test details had been logged and online I was able to get my tax!! I never even found the insurance documents!! GREAT JOY!!

Now I can finish the song.
More about that in the next post...

Old enough to be amazed

I picked up Esther from a party at 4pm today and I saw this sunset and took a picture with my phone. Not my camera, my phone. I am old enough to see the wonder in this. Our kids don't and won't see anything amazing about many of the minor miracles of technology I see and will see.

I remember my Dad saying that when he was a boy they were the first in the street to have a telephone; the neighbours would come round to look at it. (But who could they ring?)

I can remember:
- Having to turn the TV on a good 10 minutes before your programme started in order to give it time to warm up.
- The first calculators.
- The start of Breakfast TV.
- The first microwave ovens*
- Space Invaders being cutting edge.
- Video remote controls on a wire**
- The invention of the wheel...

I do feel really privileged to have been born (1969) at a time when I've been able to see and appreciate so much technological change, it amazes me in a way it may never ever amaze our kids.

* Dad would buy the first of most things. The microwave was very exciting. As a family, we stood looking through the window as the frozen sausage roll slowly turned around inside. Nothing appeared to be happening for a while until a little hole appeared in the top and acrid smoke started pouring out. Quite quickly we turned the oven off. The post mortem revealed a piece of charcoal still wrapped in apparently unaffected pastry. We were still impressed though...

** The first video film rental we watched was "Jesus Christ, Superstar". You had to pay £30 to join the Video Rental Shop. The picture quality was so bad it looked like a snowstorm throughout. We watched the whole thing though, fighting each other for the remote control on a wire...

Surprised by beauty 2

Excellent school run this morning - just back. I like being back in the routine again after the Christmas and New Year "peace and rest".

In a previous post, Surprised by beauty, I had just been listening to Radio 4, and once again...

Desert Island Discs' repeat on Radio 4 is on a Friday and by the time I get back in the car after drop off I've just missed Kirsty Young introducing her guest. Who is it, who is it? Hmmm, I don't recognise the voice, erm, or do I? Most of the time I haven't heard of them anyway, but I always find the musical choices interesting. Today Anthony Horowitz ("prolific author") chose Eleanor Rigby by the Beatles (duh!) for his first piece. I used to listen endlessly to the Beatles as a child/teenager (I remember Mum telling me that they'd split up years previous and I was gutted...) so I know this song very well.

BUT, I sat in the car on the drive, engine off, just listening until it ended. Really listening. This thing is a work of genius. It was like hearing those strings, for example, for the first time - achingly beautiful arrangement, cryingly sad, perfectly appropriate, sometimes in unison with the melody, sometimes flitting around it or harmonising, smooth and then choppy - amazing! The chromatic descent in the chorus is one of the saddest things I've heard.

Just Googled to find the score was by George Martin. Four violins, two violas, two cellos, close mic'd and no vibrato - I never noticed that.

It's a truly great example of the music mirroring the words. They go hand in hand, they are speaking the same message and the one enhances the other.

A dance for two, but as one.